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‘I am so bored of vanilla sex with my husband but find it hard to bring it up with him’ – Coleen Nolan

Dear Coleen, I’m a woman in my 40s and feel frustrated when it comes to sex with my husband.

I love him and still fancy him like mad, but sex is very routine and I want more.

I feel there’s something missing, but find it hard to bring it up with him.

I think we’ve both got lazy – sex isn’t high on the agenda any more and we usually do it late at night when we’re tired, so not much effort goes into it.

What can I do to make it better?

What is your view? Have your say in the comment section

Coleen Nolan is the Mirror's resident agony aunt
Coleen Nolan is the Mirror’s resident agony aunt

I don’t want to be anywhere near him right now.

I want him to leave for a while so I can get my head straight, but he doesn’t want to. Where do I go from here?

Coleen says

Talking about sex is often harder with the person you’re closest to, but I think it’s important to get over the embarrassment to ask for what you want.

It doesn’t have to be a serious sit-down conversation, but when you’re on your own one night, just tell your hubby you’re a bit worried sex is slipping off the agenda.

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Say it might be a good idea to talk about ways of making it more of a priority.

That should open up the discussion and you can talk more about what you’d like.

Also, telling him in bed what’s turning you on and what you want him to do can be really sexy.

Create the opportunity to have better sex – go to bed earlier instead of staying up late bingeing on Netflix.

I don’t know whether you have kids, but if you’re alone in the house, you don’t have to confine lovemaking to the bedroom.

Think back to what sex was like when you first got together and try to recreate some of those moves. And have fun!



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